Life & FamilyThoughts

Abortion- The Gray Area

We all knew I was going to talk about it sooner or later, but for those of you who have been in a 25-year coma and are just now waking up … I’m sorry. The abortion debate has been going on forever, but it has gotten really nasty these past few years. The battle between religion and science or faith and logic always makes for an interesting fight. I have been struggling on the fence with this topic for some time now but I think I have finally come to an opinion. I have come to the conclusion that it is the mothers choice to decide whether or not they want to carry the pregnancy to term. Let’s go through the arguments and see how I would counter.

“Abortion Goes Against the Bible.”

Yes, yes it does. But seriously can we stop pretending that we have been following the Bible up to the letter until this moment. We do a ton of stuff the is “against the bible.” However, I know for a fact that abortion does, in fact, fall under the commandment “thou shall not kill.” I know. I am also not going to sit here and argue when the fetus becomes alive. Science says that it is a few weeks after conception and religion says it is as soon as sperm meets egg. Honestly, I never thought this mattered much because whether or not you think the fetus is alive or not you are still taking away any possibility of life.

I have found it odd that we have decided to pick and choose which parts of the Bible we actually want to follow. We are allowed to plant different crops in the same soil but no one is allowed to be gay.

Your Options

It’s tragically sad no matter how you look at and you have to think which route you want to subject your child to because you have 3 options.

  • Get the abortion
  • Adopt the baby out and hope that it gets adopted by a good family
  • Keep the baby

That’s it. When you take away one of those options yeah the baby is going to be alive but honestly is that a good thing? Would you rather know your baby is safe in heaven or sitting in an adoption center wondering when their mom didn’t want them? Some would argue, “well at least they are alive!” Again… is that the best situation? We think of death as this horrible thing that rips families apart, but I don’t see it that way. Death to me should be looked at as a blessing, not a curse.

You Can Just Adopt.

Let’s just assume that the mother is perfectly healthy and simply wants to get an abortion for whatever reason. BUT she can’t because now it is illegal so she puts her kid up for adoption. Technically the child is alive, but what kind of life is it going to live. When you put your kid up for adoption you run the risk of it not getting adopted or getting adopted by an awful person. If abortion was illegal you would find a lot more babies at hospitals, fire stations, dumpsters, public bathrooms, and all of them would either die or be thrown into the adoption system. The system would get over crowded and mistakes would start being made.

My mom used to work as a 911 operator and we were driving around town and we passed an orphanage and at the time I didn’t know what it was so I asked. She told me that it was a place for kids that don’t have parents to get some. On the surface that seemed great, but when I got older she explained to me that every week that orphanage/ adoption center (whatever it was) calls the police department to report another missing child. See because typically babies get adopted before the older kids do and babies will slip through the cracks every once in awhile and they will spend their lives waiting for someone to want them.

Just keep the baby.

This to me is the most laughable out of the choices. Most people who are in the situation where they are
considering abortion are really not in the best situation themselves. Babies take time and money and if you are missing just one of those you are going to be struggling.

At my church, every Christmas we have these Christmas Trees that have little paper ornaments hanging from the branches. On them are the child’s gender, age, and a few things they want for Christmas. Recently, my church has color-coated these ornaments. So all the yellow ones are for needy children, blue ones are for needy children in our parish, red ones are for needy refugee children, and green ones are for pregnant mothers. At my church, we have this program where volunteers go to abortion clinics and talk women out of giving abortions, by whatever means necessary.

So these green ornaments are for the mothers who can afford the children they don’t want to have but don’t want to risk going to hell. Now I’m sure not every mother on the tree is in that situation, but I know for a fact a lot of them are…. and to be honest this is why I hate most religions. If you are going to scare someone into doing what you want then you aren’t

“It’s not fair to the mothers who can’t have children!”

You’re right it’s not fair. It’s not fair that one woman got pregnant and doesn’t want the baby while another is desperately trying to have one. It’s not fair and for the record, I never said it was fair. It also isn’t fair that I have a warm bed, a loving family, good food, a college education, a paying job, supportive friends, a roof over my head, and a beating heart…. it’s not fair for me to have a lot of things. The world is not a fair place. You have to play the cards you are dealt.


There are a million reasons why a woman would want to get an abortion and to be completely honest the whole situation is too complex for the government to regulate. If you allow women who have been raped to have an abortion then the others are going to start lying.

Pregnancy is a big deal. It’s a big decision and a huge responsibility. When you stress a mother out and take away her options the situation can become desperate. Some people think that by taking abortions away that will some how¬†make things better but it will only make things worse. Even now abortion is still technically legal, but it is so hard to find a place that does them it’s almost like seeing a unicorn. Government regulations are making it harder and harder for abortion clinics to stay open which is forcing desperate mothers into a situation they don’t want to be in. We should not punish people for doing something that is natural. When a mother decides that the best thing to do for her baby is to abort it, then no one should be in her way.

The Hardest Pill to Swallow.

The hardest part of this whole problem is the good stories. The stories of a baby that was almost aborted to go on and do great things or a baby that was adopted grows up and has a great life. It’s hard for outsiders to know what is right because all we see is the good and the bad, we don’t see what goes on behind the scenes. All we see is an adopted baby that was that went on to do great things and we assume that this is how it should always be.

We think that because it happened to this person it should happen to every person. So it is hard hearing all the amazing stories and accepting that they don’t always happen. That is why this should be the mother’s decision. The mother knows what is best for the baby even if the mother is still considered a child herself. It’s an instinct, an eight sense, a gut feeling, that tells us what to do. The government should have no say in that because they will never understand.

It is hard to convince a mother of 2 or an adoption success story that in some cases abortion is the best way to go. It is difficult to explain to them just how lucky they actually are. The world is full of nasty stories that creep up every now and then and we would much rather ignore them and believe that everything will turn out okay than face the reality of the situation.

How Do I Relate?

As I said, in the beginning, I was on the fence for a long time because I saw this issue from both perspectives. I was raised into a Catholic family and I was taught that abortion was wrong and to a degree, I still believe that. However, I see now that life is not always so black and white.

When I was 16 my dad left and it hurt because he didn’t just leave. He wanted really nothing to do with us. So it was really hard to come to terms with the idea that my own father did not want me after 16 years of raising me. Now I know that you really can’t compare my situation to theirs, but I can not imagine being left at an adoption center. I sure a lot of the kids are really positive about it, but that is something that eats away at you. If you own parents didn’t want you, then why would anyone else? I just can’t imagine not having parents or a parent. It just makes me mad when people say that instead of abortion you can adopt because that isn’t a solution.

According to the Bible, God has a plan for all of us. I think we get a little carried away and assume that everyone’s plan is to live a long, happy, and successful lives, even though we know that isn’t always the case. So what if God’s plan for the unborn was to never be born.